The other night my 4 year old came running into my room crying. Normally I’d tell her she’s fine and send her back to bed, but she was almost hysterical. When I finally got her to calm down enough to tell me what was wrong, she looked up at me with her tear filled eyes and said, “Ruby said when I’m a big kid, I won’t need you anymore. Is that true? I don’t want to be a big kid!” Oh my heart!

When I finally got her to calm down, I explained to her that when she is a big kid she will be able to do a lot on her own, but I will always be there to help her. I told her that mommy is a big person, but her Honey still helps mommy. When she connected this in her own way she looked up at me and smiled saying, “Ruby was wrong!” She gave me the biggest hug before going back to bed. These are the types of moments that we as parents live for.

As I laid in bed later that night, I couldn’t help but smile as I thought on her devastation at the idea of her not needing mommy. So much so that she says she doesn’t want to grow up. While thinking on it, God spoke saying it’s the same with us and Him. As infants in our faith, we rely on Him and others so much. But the day will come when we grow up, become “big kids” and are ready for solid food, just as 1 Corinthians 3:1-2 states.

I’m in a group prayer message with incredible mighty women of God. I posted a prayer request for myself as I’ve had health issues recently. One of the women responded with a word from the Lord. She said she had the word, but not the understanding. As I sat and read and then re-read her word over and over again, I had hoped that someone else would provide the translation for me, but it never came. I prayed then and knew that it was time for me to find understanding on my own. To seek Him separately and to ask Him for the understanding, not wait for others to give it to me.

You see, it is time for me to be a “big kid”. I can cry and protest it all I want, but growing up is inevitable. At some point, I must learn how to be independent. But just as I assured my daughter that I will always be there to help her, God assures us. Independence doesn’t mean we are left alone. He promises to never leave us in Deuteronomy 31:6. So it is time to put the bottle down and move on to solid food. It’s time to grow up and be a big kid!

Deuteronomy 31:6

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.”

1 Corinthians 3:1-2

“Brothers and sisters, I could not address you as people who live by the Spirit but as people who are still worldly-mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready.”

If you’ve ever spent more than just a few minutes speaking to me, I have no doubt that you have heard about my mom. As close as she and I are, she makes her way in to just about every conversation I have. One of my favorite stories to tell people is about the time she and I were driving around, looking at houses no doubt. I was still complaining about not being able to find a light enough shade of makeup for my wonderfully pale skin. My mom turns to me and says, “I know where we should go.” She states it so confidently and plainly that it captures my curiosity and I have to know what she’s realized that I have not. In all the seriousness she could muster she declares, “The morgue!”

Now, the reaction to this is usually a 50/50 split. Half of people are mortified that my own mother would say something like that and then they proceed to compliment my skin in an attempt to make me feel better. The other half will bust out laughing praising my mom’s sense of humor. Fortunately, I too fall into the latter category. After hearing that I should buy my makeup at the morgue since my paleness apparently reflects that of the dead, we bust out laughing together.

Curious minds may be wondering why I’m sharing this story. It’s not just to brag about how fun my mom is. I’ll tell you the reason. My mom taught me how to laugh at myself. Gasp! What kind of mom makes fun of her own child to teach them? The kind of mom that wants you to learn the realities of the world. If I could not learn to embrace myself as I am, then I would not survive. My mom always encouraged me to be myself and to love who God created me to be, but she also encouraged me to constantly better myself.

There have been numerous occasions where I have talked to my mom about something and she corrects my thinking. Whether it be on the subject of Christianity, a wife, a mother or a friend. She offers wisdom and council. Just as Titus 2:3 – 5 suggests. But on the flip side, there have many times when she offers no other wisdom or council other than to ask God. And let me tell you, more often than not I’m irritated when she says it because it would be so much easier if she just gave me the answer. But the reward when I find it on my own is worth it!

Had my mom not spent years beforehand building and nurturing a relationship with me, I would not have been able to type out that last few paragraphs. She spent the time to laugh with me, to teach me, rebuke me, correct me and point me back to God! As a mom, that is her God given job. Just as it is mine now. With my kids, it’s my turn now to build a relationship full of laughter and trust so that when the time comes for teaching, rebuking and correcting, they will trust what I say. Or rather don’t say.

I have been encouraged and challenged this past mother’s day to think on how my mom raised me. The countless stories we have with each other, often filled with laughter. I think of how she has encouraged me to love who I am, but challenges me to be better. I look at my kids now and I can only hope and pray that I am able to instill the same things in my relationship with them as she did with me. So here I am, challenging anyone who will read this. Laugh with your kids. Teach them to be silly and laugh at themselves. Tell them God created them just as they are, but we are not mean to stay as we are. Rebuke their behavior, but correct it too. But make sure that in all those things, there is laughter and love!

Titus 2:3 – 5

^“Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”

Proverbs 22:6

“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”